But for some people, something a little bit harder, more dangerous, and somewhat kinkier is all that will get them excited, wet and hard.
However, with Malta being the repressed, conservative nation that it is – though things are slowly changing – some people have to turn to specific websites or apps to find the right partner.
For people interested in BDSM, domination, and the more fetish-focused side of life, websites like FetLife are becoming more and more popular for people to use. And seeing that there are 1,472 Maltese members on this site alone, there’s a decent chance you might even know a user.
Lovin Malta spoke to two young Maltese people who turned to FetLife to express their sexuality. One man, one woman, and a whole lot of kinky ideas – but did their experiences live up to what they were expecting?
“It’s a fucking minefield out there” – Waylon, 27
“FetLife is a social network for those looking for anything related to kink, whether that’s threesomes, roleplay or cock and ball torture (CBT). I’m on FetLife to meet like minded people for some fun experiences, hook ups for me. It’s not really designed for vanilla hook ups, but you can try ux.”
“I ended up meeting a Maltese girl through FetLife. She was really into meeting, calling me daddy and everything before ever meeting me. That actually got me concerned that I might be speaking to some kind of predator.”
“Even then, after we met in my car, I didn’t leave things lying around, and I didn’t take her to my place. I was very wary.”
“Turns out she was just a freak though”
“I go on FetLife in bursts. Over the last nine months, I had one burst where I went on every day for a week, and another burst of two days over the last nine months.”
“I’ve messaged some people but didn’t get many responses – but that’s better than no response.”
“So yeah – between that, various no responses, and one freaky chick I still speak to but it’s kind of weird… not my favourite place, but pretty cool nonetheless.”
“I realised that I was basically born to be a femme domme” – Lisa*, 28
“My boyfriend told me about it. We were doing some kinky stuff, and I joined it to get some inspiration. After I spent a lot of time wading through all the chastity belts and cock rings, I realised that I was basically born to be a femme domme.”
“Now, I use it to find out about kinky parties and keep in touch with people I’ve met at these parties. I’ve ended up dating one girl from FetLife. We ended up going on two or three dates.”
“I attended a party with my boyfriend and one guy I met on FetLife after adding him. He ended up becoming my submissive partner for just that one night.”
“I guess it’s actually not as interesting as I would have wished – I only have one Maltese friend on it (I’ve used FetLife abroad as well) and girls do much better than guys on it – supply and demand!”
“But it was a positive experience – I even ended up going to a munch once because of FetLife and met a lot of other girls that are into kink. A munch is a meet up for people who are into kink – but you don’t do kinky things, and you wear normal clothes.”
*Fake names have been used